Mirror Mirror **

The crux of the Snow White story is oddly missing in Tarsem Singh’s adaptation of the classic fairy-tale – namely the dominant power of the mirror that controls the destiny of all who stares into it. This cocky, camp modernization attempts a blend modern-day austerity/irony with family-friendly humour that doesn’t quite mesh. Its lead star Julia Roberts as the wicked stepmother is neither convincingly evil nor devishly funny, and spends the majority of the time merely looking smug at all her screen time – Singh has certainly got his A-list exposure for his money.

The story is a very 21^st Century take on the fairy-tale: The wicked Queen (Roberts) has it all, taxing the poor to pay for her lavish parties and luxuries, but is forever unintentionally upstaged by her annoyingly beautiful and good-natured stepdaughter, Snow White (Phil Collins’s daughter Lily). As the Queen is verging on bankruptcy, a rich young prince called Prince Andrew Alcott (Armie Hammer loving every dashingly handsome second) happens upon her kingdom after being stripped of his possessions by vertically challenged bandits in the forest. The spoilt Queen sees her opportunity for some male arm candy while filling the palace coffers. But things don’t go to plan as Andrew falls for Snow White – or ‘Snow’ (very street). The peeved Queen banishes Snow to the forest to be disposed of by long-suffering courtier Brighton, played by Nathan Lane. Naturally, he isn’t up to the task, and Snow flees, taking refuge with the bandits – or Seven Dwarfs. They all hatch a plan to stop the spendthrift Queen and her upcoming nuptials, and reunite Snow with her rightful regal legacy – and one true love.

Singh has certainly created something different and contemporary with the context, jumping from compellingly dark Brothers Grimm setting to teenage angst tale to slapstick pantomime – largely when the film’s fool, Lane, is on screen. This inconsistent momentum is irksomely sown together by any excuse to feature Roberts in one grand costume design after another, who has to have the last fleeting word, upstaging the usually hilarious Lane’s Birdcage antics that he is loved for.

In fact, the only person who comes out of the Roberts adulation unscathed is Hammer who revels in every scene he is in, managing to carry the only truly funny running joke in the film that sees him half naked against his will most of the time. The Collins-Hammer pairing makes the snowy, magical setting sparkle, and is enough with the stunning design values to aptly entertain. That said, although you sympathise with the plight of the Snow White character from what you already know, there is an inconsistent character arc with Singh’s modern incarnation who transforms from radiant innocent one minute to jaded tomboy the next, all with a sense of urgency at making Snow appeal to contemporary ‘girl power’ expectations. Combined with a creepy dwarf’s Snow lusting, it all seems a little too realistic for fairy-tale comfort.

Still, with no 3D to contend with – only a nauseating excuse for the cast to jig away to a Bollywood bangra beat finale, Mirror Mirror may well be a magical muddle minus any real mirrored mystery, and make sure we all know Roberts is the fairest (and unfunniest) of them all, but it has its quaint charms and socio-political issues for the more savvy kid out there, tired of the usual bedtime story.

2/5 stars

By @FilmGazer

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