You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger ***
Focusing on the standard prediction from many a fortune-teller, Woody Allen offers his latest London-set relationship riddle, You Will Meet A Tall Dark Stranger, attracting the usual international talent that includes Naomi Watts, Josh Brolin, Freida Pinto, Anthony Hopkins, Antonio Banderas, Lucy Punch and Gemma Jones.
Though not of the high calibre of Allen’s heyday, and becoming entrenched in his relationship dramedies, as always, Allen’s casting is his films’ calling card and source of enjoyment when he gets it right. Indeed, one positive of any Allen affair is the age range of his characters, with the token, silly older male chasing younger skirt to fulfil a mature male fantasy. And this film is no exception, offering another crowd-pleaser in its study of deeply flawed human beings trying to make sense of their lot, in their (often) fruitless search for true love and fulfilment. Allen’s cast do not let him down.
This time, though, there is a touch of the Mike Leigh about the subject matter, with a slightly gritty ‘kitchen sink realism’ that was lost in the whimsical and decadent London-based Match Point. Bridget Jones’s Gemma Jones is the comical and neurotic Leigh ‘character-on-the-verge-of-a-nervous-breakdown’, Helena Shebritch, the older woman dumped in her latter years by her husband, Alfie (Hopkins), who fears impending mortality. Desperate to know what life holds next for her, Helena visits a fortune-teller (Pauline Collins), recommended by her daughter, Sally (Watts), who also has relationship problems with her frustrated, aspiring writer husband Roy (Brolin). What follows are the natural ups and downs, frank opinions and relationship upsets, as each character collides with another along the way in finding their own course.
The depressingly frank views on relationship survival rates reiterates the irony of the film’s title, and although hopeless and unresolved on the matter, which may unsettle or frustrate some who watch this, there is a certain lightness and frivolity running throughout to the whole affair that borders of cynicism. As the majority of the characters are self-absorbed and petty, we are openly invited to scorn or mock their futile attempts at finding happiness. However, there are times when their behaviour alienates any empathy we might otherwise feel, which is a problem for Allen in keeping the status quo credible.
That said, the rather fanciful pairing of Hopkins as an aging ‘playboy’ Alfie, opposite Punch as gold-digging escort Charmaine is always a bittersweet source of amusement. Both actors are superb in their scenes together; especially Punch who packs a namesake in this. Although the most cartoonish of the lot, Allen gives Hopkins as Alfie space to deliver the most heart-felt and candid monologue in the film that strikes the only real chord throughout.
In fact the most incredulous and silliest pairing is Brolin with Pinto playing the confused young music scholar, Dia, who falls for the oafish fumblings of older Roy that does seem a tad far-fetched. If you had a (dirty old) stranger watching your every move in your flat in London, agreeing to lunch with him would be the last thing on your agenda. It makes for a rather sour taste in the mouth, too, almost making a mockery of the daily disturbing cases of stalking in the capital. Even though there is a touch of Hitchcockian Rear Window about their budding acquaintance, those nostalgic and romantic days of carefree stranger meetings are long gone to be believable, nowadays.
Watts is the most credible of the lot as broody Sally, wanting to balance a career with having a family – a situation the majority of working women face at some stage in the metropolis; the ultimate sacrifice. Falling for her boss, Greg (Banderas) still seems plausible in this context, especially when things at home are not going smoothly, and she longs for a bit of adulation and escapism herself. Sally is the bedrock that the others congregate to and bounce off. She is the truth and reason barometer of the lot. However, Allen cuts her presence short in an unsatisfactory manner in the plot, giving her little time to put her affairs in order.
If the answer to eternal happiness is being explored and sought here, you may be sorely disappointed. Allen avoids giving any possible answers or resolutions – apart from ‘getting in touch with your spiritual side’, and instead, throws some suggestions out there, in the hope that one of them will appease the viewer. Although all the actors have their chance to shine and entertain, you can’t help but feel deflated at the end. Perhaps, like the characters, there are many expectations as to what the conclusions should be? However, whether this provocative ending is sheer mastery, or downright laziness on Allen’s part is always going to be subjective. But like our future, it all feels a little unset and incomplete.
3/5 stars
By @FilmGazer
